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By: Joanne Kimes
After delivering your baby, you’re exhausted, hormonal, and have genitals that feel like they’ve been put through a paper shredder. Then you come home and spend the next few weeks entertaining every friend, family member, and neighbor who’s desperate to see your baby as if you gave birth to David Beckham. Now, after six weeks of abstinence, your doctor says it’s okay to have sex again, but between your lack of sleep, the endless to-do list, and if you’re nursing, having your baby attached to your breast like a nipple ring, sex is the last thing on your mind. Unfortunately, it’s the first thing on your husband’s. nbsp;
Whether it happens the night of your six-week check up or weeks afterward (if you were smart enough NOT to tell your husband you’ve been given the green light), there will come a time where you’re going to have sex again. If you’re nervous about getting back in the saddle again (with your panty liner and blow-up donut of course), there are a few things you can do to help. Just remember that sex after childbirth is like losing your virginity: in both cases you just want to get it over with and you know it’s going to hurt. nbsp;
Lupe up: If you’re breastfeeding, you can expect your vaginal walls to be drier than a Bond martini due to your decreased estrogen level. Before you even think about having sex, head over to your local drug store for some vaginal lubrication. nbsp;
Relax: Have your partner give you a back rub, light some candles, and have a nice glass of wine. nbsp;
Nursing pads: If you’re nursing, don’t be surprised if sexual excitement causes your breasts to leak. Unless your partner wants to wear fowl weather gear to bed, I’d suggest you let him be on top. nbsp;
Don’t push it: If you experience pain, have your husband proceed with caution and take things nice and slow. nbsp;
Don’t expect miracles: It may take a few weeks before you’re vagina is back on its feet again and months before your sex drive returns.
(For more sucky parenting advice, check out sucksandthecity )
My husband and I had trouble with getting back into it after we had our daughter. It was really more me than him, he still wanted to but I was not into it. I think there were several reasons, all the usual ones, I was tired, irritable, felt unattractive, low libido. I figured it was a lost cause, I mean how do you resolve a problem with 4 different causes! But, I love my husband and our family and didn’t want us to be driven apart.
We were able to get our love life back on track, thankfully! One of my friends recommended a great program… Http://tiny.cc/sexafterpregnancy This program can help to show you how to overcome all obstacles to romance with your significant other after pregnancy, most of which are in your head, lol! If you are a new parent and your love life is on the back burner, you should definitely check it out. Best of luck