Keisha's Kismet
Not many women can drive, adjust her daughter's pink wig and answer questions about how she keeps her marriage hot after 12 years at the same time. But not many women are Keisha Whitaker, the effervescent and effusive wife of Oscar Nominee Forest Whitaker. I had the good fortune to talk to Ms. Whitaker on the fly, in between school pick up and a dentist visit for one of her three daughters, ages 14, 10 and 8.
Paused at a red light, Keisha tells me her secret to tireless passion:
"I'm playful and flirtatious by nature, which is good for a marriage. But you have to put effort into it."
Personally, I hate to flirt and I'm a Capricorn, so silly is out of the question. I need more help. Luckily Keisha has more words of wisdom.
"For instance, I'm always keeping an eye out for things that Forest likes, to surprise him."
How fun. Like what?
"Peanut butter cups," she giggles.
I don't giggle enough, that's a problem right there.
Really?
"Oh yes, so whenever I see them I get them. I try to get him fancy organic ones, but then he's like, 'what are these?' she says, laughing.
Clearly, loving your man the way Keisha does is another way to keep it hot. The Whitakers met when Keisha was 21 and living in Boston. She was a model then and a casting director approached her for an indie that Forest was in town to shoot. They thought she'd be perfect to play his wife. Good eye. Not only did she play the role, but she went on to live it.
"We started dating before the movie wrapped." When I ask her if she was worried about getting involved with an actor she says,
"In my mind, I was a famous catalogue model so he was taking a risk too...I'm kidding."
A former model who can kid? What more could a movie star with Mr. Whitaker's gifts ask for? How about a woman who is also a completely devoted mother too.
Keisha tells me about preparing for the Golden Globes, how her friend, stylist Phillip Bloch, and her make up artist AJ (who flew in from NY) came to her home to get her ready. She was all primped and perfect, about to step in to her car when her daughter took ill. There she was, gown and all, holding back her daughter's hair in the bathroom against her friends' warnings that she'd get messed up,
"I'm her mother, this is what I do!" she shouted through the bathroom door. She comforted her daughter and made it to the show looking absolutely lovely.
Mr. Whitaker has been given tremendous critical praise, a Golden Globe and now an Oscar nomination for Best Actor for his recent portrayal of Idi Amin in "The Last King of Scotland".
Keisha stressed the importance of communication between husband and wife in maintaining a loving relationship while we spoke, so I ask her how they stayed in contact given the specific demands of this recent role,
"We normally talk on the phone 5-10 times a day when Forest is on location, we have Blackberries. This was one of the first movies we didn't communicate as often. He didn't come out of character very often, but he would to speak to me."
Although it is challenging to have a husband "who can't make every birthday," one of the perks of being with a man who travels to different locations is that it keeps their marriage fresh.
"This relationship allows me to grow as a person and still be myself.... When someone travels a lot you get comfortable with yourself and your independence...so you can be together, but not suffocating each other. There are so many homecomings and you get to discover places together. It keeps it more like dating."
I should have married Forrest Whitaker, I think, except we've never met, I'm not a model and like I said, I'm no fun. And it really does feel like these two charismatic parents were meant to be together. According to her, Forest is "calm, sensitive and a great Dad to daughters." Which seems like the perfect compliment to Keisha, whose energy and feistiness can be felt even over a cell phone in traffic. Asked what she recommends to other hot moms to keep the homefires burning, she responds,
"Your hair looks cute, yes, it does, perfect." Except she wasn't talking to me, it was to her daughter who just had pulled off the pink wig before going in to the dentist office. "I let my daughters do their own thing," she tells me getting out of her car.
Her thoughts for the rest of us?
"Always expect the unexpected, always remember yourself," and most importantly,
"Your marriage should have plenty of respect and plenty of treats!"
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