Make Time for Romance!
By Cynthia Hanson
Make time for romance! So he doesn’t bring you flowers, and you don’t surprise him with funny cards. It’s been months since you went out on a date, and you can’t remember the last time you talked about anything except the kids, house or work schedules.
“One of the dilemmas of a long-term relationship is that, over time, the newness wears off, routine sets in and romance goes out the door,” explains Marc D. Rabinowitz, a psychotherapist in Norfolk, Va. “Add in familiarity, resentments and unmet expectations, and couples end up getting emotionally distant. The more emotionally distant you become, the less likely you are to do romantic things or spend time together.”
But with effort and commitment, you can keep romance alive. The payoff: “Having a romantic relationship will help you feel better about yourself and your partner,” says Jennifer Jones, a couples therapist with the Council for Relationships in Philadelphia. “It also will increase your emotional and physical connection, which can help you weather difficult times.”
Try these five tips to find time for romance:
1. Unplug! Technology can ooze into your relationship if you’re not careful. “Agree to turn off your cell phone, TV and computer during the first hour you’re home together after work and spend that time catching up with each other,” advises Jones. “Setting boundaries will help you create a space for conversation.”